Emotional Weekend

Today is Monday, and I am 25 weeks 3 days pregnant, and mybaby is the size of an eggplant.  Thepast couple of days have been an emotional roller coaster!  Health wise, Baby Finn and I are bothgreat.  My bleeding has been minimal to nonexistent,and of course “Dance Party” has been moving and grooving like crazy.  Even gets the hiccups pretty regularly.  But, name an emotion, and I have had it overthe last few days.  Fear?  You bet! Exhaustion?  Comes with sleeplessnights.  Disappointment?  Beyond measure.  Joy? Have you met my son, he came to see me. Pride? I have 2 of the most well behaved red-heads you have evermet.  I could go on and on…

I have been continually blessed with visitors.  My parents came by themselves on Fridaynight, then my husband and 3 kids on Saturday. Emma and Lara were only here a couple of hours before a friend whiskedthem away to an event filled sleepover with a good friend who used to live inStillwater but is now here in the city. She texted me pictures throughout their day/night, and a good time was definitelyhad by all!  Britt and Jake stayed herewith me, and we watched our beloved OSU Cowboys beat Texas A&M.  It was so fun – and since Jake slept throughmost of the game, Britt and I enjoys some quiet time, too!  (Not took long after the game started, Jakeasked for a blanket, curled up on the couch with his Bobby, stuck his thumb inhis mouth, and was OUT for almost 3 hours!) Sunday, my parents came again to see me, and to pick up the Twisters aftertheir fun adventure.  They all hung outwith me for a couple of hours – the girls painted their fingernails while theywere here – then it was quiet for a little while.  Sunday evening, 2 families from my AMAZINGLifeGroup came by, too.  It just makesthe time go faster and also allows us all to build our relationships and stayconnected.  I am so thankful for their kindnessand diligence to help me through this crazy time in my life.

But, it was not all candy and roses this weekend.  We had a little “domestic disturbance” on thehall that left me scared, mad, helpless, and frustrated.  It actually happened the first time Thursdaynight.  Twice a day, they hook me up tothe monitor for an hour to gauge Finn’s heart tones and my contractions.  It’s a long hour every time as I have to layflat on my back and lie very still since he is such a wiggler and tends to getaway from the monitor at least once or twice a session.  So, imagine my frustration Thursday nightwhen my hour was up and my nurse was NOT coming back!  30 extra minutes, and a nursing student comesin, simply to turn off the machine and take the belts off me.  While that was a physical relief, I had heardthe ruckus in the hall, and it had “tied up” my nurse, so I was curious, naturally!  So, she did come in several minutes later toadminister meds, and she kinda of joked about the “domestic” we werehaving.  7 OKC police men were on thehall.  So, to small town Betsey, that wasa lot, and kind of raised my awareness. Fast Forward to Saturday night, late. Britt and Jake were in Stillwater at the airport welcoming the OSUCowboy football team and staff back to Stillwater when I started textinghim.  The lady next door was justHYSTERICAL!  She was screaming andyelling (cussing) and throwing things (that were breaking), there was a man’svoice dishing it out just as bad as she was. Mind you, I was hooked up to the baby monitor, basically TRAPPED to mybed, and it sounded like they were in this room with me (thin walls).  It escalated A LOT before I heard securityget involved.  Plus, I was texting Brittand my friend who had my girls like crazy. She offered to come up here, but they wouldn’t have let her in sincethey were dealing with this out in the hall. Again, I am well past my hour mark on monitoring, I am now scared,helpless and MAD!   Felt so helpless!  Strapped to my bed, can’t get up, weak frombeing on bed rest for weeks, no lock on my door, don’t feel safe, nurses can’tget to me… SCARED!  They finallyintervened and got the situation under control. But after about an hour, it started up AGAIN!  How did he get back up on the floor?  WHO let him in???  Long story short, Britt ended up on the phonewith the charge nurse for the shift at about 11:30 who came down and blew somehot air and told me they were trying to get the guy off the floor and bannedfrom coming back (not sure of the relationship, but come to find out this ladyis a bit coo coo for cocoa puffs and hates her husband/baby daddy).  She told me this patient was “not a threat tothe floor,” and that “she’s just angry” which I told her was fine and good, butshe was definitely a disturbance.  Sheasked if I wanted to move rooms to down the hall.  Um, NO! I am settled in here, I have decorated, all my STUFF is here, I’m notmoving.  To which she said, “We can bringa cart and we will help you.”  I declinedagain, and suggested the Crazy next door be moved.  She didn’t answer that and left thinking shehad pacified me, when all she had done was stirred my pot and left me with arestless, sleepless night.

The next morning, one of my doctors came in, and were-hashed the night’s events as well – I was making sure she too knew I was notpleased with the situation.  Shepatronized me and said it’s hard to witness something like that when you’re notused to living in a big city where things like that tend to happen.  UGH! Then, she offered me anti-depressants. REALLY?!?!  How ‘bout you justmake sure I am safe, and start the psycho next door on someanti-psychotics!  I am FINE – just needto feel safe and well cared for and that I am getting my money’s worth – which Idid not feel that night.

Anyway – I am better now. And NO – I am not on any anti-depressants.  I will not dwell on that awful 12 hours, andI slept much better the next night.  MyIV relocation went very well yesterday, and 2 of my doctors have now mentionedif my bleeding stays away for a week we may consider sending me home.  I am not pinning any hopes on that.  I’m not sure that is a good idea, since Iwould be back home on bed rest, and I would be home in my house alone all day,and that’s a scary prospect if something were to go wrong.  I feel safer (most of the time) here withnurses and doctors and medical care. But, we’re not even to that conversation yet, so I’m not even giving itmuch thought.  Just thought it wasinteresting that 2 of the 3 doctors have now mentioned it.

I am looking forward to a lunch guest today and a solo visitfrom my husband tonight.  I watched somegood football games and new fall TV series on the tube this week, and know I willcontinue to do that this week as well.  Iam also proud that I got my wedding rings off for the first time in MONTHS so Isent them back to Stillwater with Britt for a good cleaning and to bere-plated, as they were SO dirty.  Notsure if I will put them back on or not…

Also, notice the new link at the top of the page.  Members of my LifeGroup have started a bankaccount for us to help with medical bills. I would like to publicly thank Gabi Martin, Daniel Thrasher, JohnCrawford and the rest of LTC for making this happen for us.  We have no idea what the financial ramificationsof this ordeal will be, but it will be stressful for our family, and we aregrateful for the offer to help.