2022 Came and Went

 And I never posted. There will be an update soon!

One Word: 2022

I don't know about you, but I'm feeling 22! 2022, that is.  And for me, a new year means a new focus.  I choose a word every year to help focus my accomplishments, to remind me of my purpose, and to help me grow in some way.  Some years, I feel like I choose the word, and many years, it feels like the word chooses me.  Before I start writing, I pray about my life, my areas of opportunity for growth, and what I want to accomplish in the coming year.  I entered 2020 with the nativity we all had - completely unaware of the rough seas that were on the horizon.  We opened 2021 with hope, plans, and the promise of things turning around - only to not see it turn out quite that way.  So, we enter 2022 with more of that hope for 2021, but also the reality that this is the new normal.  Supply chain issues, inflation, masks, Covid variants, vaccines and boosters, uncertainty.  So, with all of those thoughts in my prayers, the one word that found me this year is SATISFIED.

The first word that came to me, honestly, was "content."  As in, "in a state of peaceful happiness."  Gratified, fulfilled, happy, pleased.  But, because of the social media, streaming services, internet connected world we live in hears "CONtent" and thinks immediately of the created content we consume every waking moment, I dove a little deeper.  thought more about the meaning of each of these similar words, and what my goals are for 2022.  That's when I landed on satisfied.  Contented; pleased. Content, fulfilled, quenched. I love the imagery there!

As many of you know, I struggle (STRUG. GLE.) with depression.  Sprinkled with an inappropriate but omnipresent amount of anxiety.  I usually have it under control with medication, self-reflection, writing, and the loving support of my AMAZING husband.  But some days, it is overwhelming.  I have physical, as well as spiritual, and emotional responses to this - and they're not always positive.  And are never in the best interest of my overall health.  So, I work on this every day.  Somedays, I win.  Many days, the demons do.  So, for 2022, after all the negativity, struggle, and unevenness of the last 2 calendar years, I am looking toward finding ways to be satisfied.  With everything.

Not perfection. Not necessarily happiness  But peace; contentment; fulfillment.  A feeling of my thirst for life being gratifyingly quenched - no matter the circumstance.  I have let my CIRCUMSTANCES determine my resp0nse for way too long.  I am going to focus on how blessed I am, WE ARE, in every way.  

The timing of the global pandemic, the end of my Master's degree studies, and a seismic job change have left me a little lost.  Parenting 2 adult children, a strong-willed teenaged boy, and a tween who just wants to find his place is TOUGH!  Add to that aging parents for both me and my husband, a home to maintain, etc etc etc.  And, mourning the perceived  "loss" of my girls.  While my nest isn't empty, my girls are not here to keep my Mama Cup filled in the way only a daughter can.  I miss them SO DANG MUCH!  But, I also LOVE watching them fly!  I love the maturity that comes with this stage in life.  I am enjoying hearing their stories - triumphs and rough patches alike, but I miss being able to hug them, share silly stories, or just watch a TV show together on a whim.  I guess I need girl time more than I thought!  Add to that, in my old job position, I had 2 BEST FRIENDS in the office.  We talked every single day - multiple times a day - about EVERYTHING.  Work, husbands, kids, dogs, our families, our dreams, our goals.  We just "get" each other.  And we are working diligently to maintain that friendship, but it's a lot harder when we are not all in the same place 9 hours a day.  Add to that, in my new position, I am the only woman on our very small team.  It's an adjustment, for sure.

There is satisfaction in ALL of it, and I am choosing to find it, and EMBRACE it.  I tend toward the negative, and I know that, so this is a stretch for me.  I am here for it!  I want to be satisfied.  I want to feel content.  I yearn to drink from the fountain and feel quenched.  2022 will be this for me.

Like 6:21 (NLV) says, " God blesses you who are hungry now, for you will be satisfied. God blesses you who weep now, for in due time you will laugh."  This speaks to me as I enter into this new season of my life.  The last two years have left me hungry.  So now, it is a time for satisfaction.  There was weeping, so now let there be laughter. This is one of God's faithful promises.

I also enjoy looking back over my one word posts from years past to see how I came to use them as my focus for the year and to assess outcomes.  How well I was able to maintain that focus.  What God brought me to or brought me through because of my one word.  How my family changed and grew from my yearly focus.  Here is a list of the previous posts, if you are interested:

2021 - hope

2020 - breathe
2019 - listen
2018 - welcome
2017 - closer  (I was anxious, and blog-averse, as we opened 2017, so it's a short FB post)
2016 - greater
2015 - brave
2014 - joyful
2013 - resolution

Here is to 2022.  Welcome! May you be satisfied in so many ways!

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