Party of Six

How in the world has an entire month gone by without an update from the Dream Weavers?  Oh… Yeah… Six people make for a VERY busy life under one roof!  Let’s see…  Professional development classes for me, dance for Lara, basketball season came to an apex and (an undefeated) close for Jake, various family members went to the dentist, Britt and Betsey started Stillwater March for Babies committee meetings (mark your calendar for Saturday, September 20), Britt started working a night job at the print shop for Eskimo Joe’s Promotional Products Group, we attended an NBA Thunder game as a family, survived snow storms and snow days (which will have to be made up), Emma and Lara went to a middle school dance, various birthday parties and sleepovers for the big kids, signing Emma up for spring volleyball, Alpha Delta Pi meetings and events for me, Finn is two (and all that entails), and yesterday it was 78 degrees outside and tonight baseball practice starts for Jake.  WHEW!  What’d I miss?  LOTS I am sure.  I am so thankful for my fun, busy, crazy family; but it is kind of overwhelming to look back over a month and see all that has happened!

I feel like we are falling into a routine with the new work schedules.  It is still crazy for me to get out the door and be ta work by 7:30, but I am making it every day.  I sure like getting off at 2:00!  Gives me a minute to breathe!  To run errands, be creative and work on Dream Weaver Prints business, and to be there for my kids when they get home from school.  Even if I’m not armed and ready with gourmet snacks and fresh squeezed lemonade, I am THERE!  We do chores, laundry, watch TV, whatever until it’s time to start dinner.  Which is early!  With Britt working nights, he gets home from his day job about 5:15, and needs to leave for his night job at 5:40.  That’s 30 minutes to eat, change, and love on him!  So, we start dinner about 4:00 these days!  Emma and Lara are ESSENTIAL in this process!  They are either helping me prep food, or helping keep Finn out of the kitchen!  We have tried lots of fun recipes and have generally enjoyed working as a family to make sure Daddy has a good dinner before he takes off to work hard for our family.  It may not be what we ever wanted, but we are making the most of it!

As for Finn and what’s up in his unique little preemie world…  We decided a couple of weeks ago that he was not progressing as we wanted him too.  Yes, SoonerStart (early intervention) comes once a month or so to evaluate him, and they think he’s doing “fine,” but there are just so many things we WASN’T doing!  Like, I don’t know… EATING!  We had been told to encourage him, and to introduce new textures, and the list goes on.  Nothing was working.  And he was just too skinny in our opinions.  Add to that, he isolates himself at school and doesn’t participate, won’t talk to his teachers, and has some other peculiar social traits.  We decided it was time to get a professional opinion.  Off to the pediatrician we went!  We left there knowing he has not gained a single ounce in 4 months, but had grown taller, with a prescription for an appetite stimulant, a referral to an endocrinologist, and a referral to an occupational therapist.  And a smile on our faces 3 miles wide knowing we were getting help for our little man who we were tired of watching struggle.

We started the appetite stimulant last Tuesday morning.  He takes it twice a day with food.  So, we give it to him at 7:00am after his “breakfast” Pedia Sure and at 2:30-ish after his “afternoon snack” Pedia Sure.  The drug fact sheet stated that “you might notice an increased appetite after prolonged use.”  If by prolonged use, you mean one dose, then YES!  Yes, it does increase appetite!  He has been eating more food in the past week than he did in the past 6 months combined!  More volume, more variations, better foods (not just Goldfish crackers and pudding), more frequency!  His cute little belly just sticks out all the time now!  We are so happy it is working so well for him!  And the even bigger bonus, it has COMPLETELY changed his attitude and demeanor!  Finn has always been a sweet boy, but he was often grumpy and inconsolable, and hard to get him to participate in anything.  Now, he is happier, more involved and engaged, and sleeping better.  He’s also a bit more ornery, but we’ll take it!  In one short week, he has become a completely different child.  It makes us wonder if he was just hungry all along but didn’t know how to fix it.  Or his blood sugar levels were all over the place due to lack of nutrition…  Poor guy!  We’re just happy to see him doing SO MUCH better!

Today we start another adventure with him.  He has his first evaluation with an Occupational Therapist here in town.  We are hoping to help him learn the skills and confidence to do things more independently.  With Mommy, Daddy, 3 older siblings, and Nana the Wonder Sitter, it’s no wonder he doesn’t want to be self-sufficient!  We hope to just help him learn what he needs to be more in par with his peers.  And of course, a bit selfishly perhaps, we want him to be less clingy and needy.  We know part of that is being 2, but having raised 3 other 2 year olds, and knowing how incredible smart he is (sometime I’ll tell you about his puzzle skills), I know he is capable of so much more!  I just can’t wait to see him thrive! 

The break between updates will not be as long next time.  I hope the Occupational Therapy takes off like the appetite stimulant did, and we see fast results!  We’re still waiting on the referral for the endocrinologist, too.  My prayer is that in 6 months, we will look back on this and know we did the right thing and will be able to see marked improvement in our awesome preemie!  He has always been the kind that needed an extra push!  Always a fighter, our Finicky Finn!

Perfect ... ly Comfortable

"I am perfectly comfortable being an 'average' mom.  My kids ride the bus; they eat school food.  They are encouraged to explore extra-curricular activities - one at a time.  Time (& money) I would spend making lunches, driving around, making chaotic schedules work, buying more 'stuff,' we spend making memories.  House wide Nerf gun fights.  Dinners for 6 around the dinner table opened with prayer.  Movie nights with popcorn.  We may not eat organic and be on trend with the latest fad, but we are happy. And I won't feel guilty about it."

If this sounds a bit familiar, you may read my Facebook updates from time to time.  Or, at least last night about 8:00pm to be exact.  Where did this come from, you might ask?  At least my husband did.  He was in the other room watching the pro-bowl.  I had just put the 2 year old to bed and sent the three bigs to their rooms for winding down hour.  I wasn't ready to start Downton Abbey yet, so I checked Facebook - as I often do...

Sometimes, Facebook is so incredibly useful!  I have found great bargains, learned of impending nuptials and heard about future little ones to join the world.  I can keep in contact with my cousins and friends spread from Oregon to Kansas to Virginia and Boston to New York City.  I have life long friends, brand new friends, Twin Mommy friends, and mommas of babies born in May 2002.  Sorority Sisters, Life Group members, My brother's college buddies, and friends of my parents.  INCREDIBLE.  I can learn about things I never dreamed of - and watch videos that I wish I could un-see.  But a lot of times, I have to admit,  I feel bullied by other moms.  Now, I know some of this is self-induced.  I should be able to pull up my big (and I mean BIG!) girl panties and blow it off.  But a lot of what I see just makes me want to scream.  And log off.  For a long time.  But, I can't.  Not for long anyway.  I have to have my personal account to manage my small business account.  And oh yeah!  My regular paying job is in social media. Yup - can't neglect that! I have to get better at filtering out the stuff that makes me bang my head against the wall.

So, I was a bit fed up with feeling like a bad mom last night for probably having BPA laden plastic-wear in my fridge with last week's left over chili in it.  Chili made with beef.  Beef that I have no idea about where it was grown or what the cattle were fed.  And I probably cleaned my kitchen counter top that it was prepared on with something someone somewhere has labeled as a poison to children everywhere!  But you know what?  That chili was GREAT!  The kids loved it, hubby loved it, I LOVED IT.  Got told it was the "Best Chili Ever" by an 11 year old tween girl.  HIGH PRAISE!  If you have raised the breed, you know...

So, yes.  My girls ride to school (almost) every day on a big, stinky, bumpy yellow school bus.  Both ways.  My oldest son walks 5 blocks.  Both ways.  Unless it's cold.  Or he is slow moving, then he gets a ride from Dad.  I leave for work long before they all go to school, and the 1st grader is just lucky the school is on Dad's way to work.  And they all 3 eat school lunches.  At a reduced price, too.  YUP!  We're that family!  I don't know a Bento box from a window box.  And Idon'tevencare.  They get a good, nutritious lunch.  And a lesson in life.  All paid for by my tax dollars.  Works for us.  And, I'm OK with their public education.  I have several homeschooling friends.  To them I say, "Good on ya!"  I don't have the patience or desire for it.  And my baby?  In my opinion he goes to the best darned Mother's Day Out pre-school in town 2 days a week and has the BEST Nana on the planet for the other 3.  But, I didn't look at all the reports or do extensive interviewing to find out.  I just went with my gut.  And biology.  :)

I am also perfectly OK with my perfectly comfortable kids.  While my girls both made honor roll last semester, I wouldn't be surprised if that doesn't happen this time around.  School is harder for some kids than others.  Testing makes some anxious while others take it all in stride.  I read an article someone had posted on Facebook last week about how college isn't meant for everyone.  Some kids will go to trade school.  Or be an apprentice somewhere.  Who will be the next generation's plumbers and hair stylists?  Maybe one or more of my kids.  And I would be so proud.  Or maybe they all go to college.  I want to encourage them, but not push them beyond their abilities - just to compete with the "Joneses."  Same with the extra activities.  While I'm pretty sure I don't have the next piano prodigy or sports superstar, I want them to do what they like and want to offer them the opportunities I can, while keeping them balanced .  Each child can do 1 "extra" thing at a time.  I have a dancer, a volleyball player, and a sports enthusiast that plays each sport in season as long as they don't overlap.  The baby's pass-time is going to doctor appointments.  *sigh* But, at this stage in life, they just need to be kids.  Have time to find out what they like.  Play with the neighbors.  After all, Eli and Peyton didn't play football until 8th or 9th grade...

So, Facebook.  I turn the other cheek.  I am not going to let the mom bullying get to me anymore.  I am a good mom.  My 4 kids have enough.  They get to see my husband and I live, love, fight and make-up.  We are all under the same roof every night, and we eat dinner as a family at least 6 nights a week - at a table with mismatched chairs.  We pray together, laugh together, love together, and hurt together.  WE ALL have been extremely blessed.  We're all in this together.  The kids know they have to look out for each other and help us around the house - without complaining.  And without an allowance or any other payment for that matter.  They have 8 very busy hands.  Dad and I have 4 full time working hands, that do the very best they can at home to keep everyone clean, healthy, fed, educated and entertained.  Our calendar is busy, and we like it that way.  But, we also like knowing down time is coming.  And we can just breathe.  And be a family.  Without trying to out-do anyone, prove anything, or achieve unrealistic goals.  God is our provider, and our judge.  We live our lives in a way that (we pray) is pleasing to Him, and that's all that should matter. And we are HAPPY!

If you got this far, you deserve a cookie.  Or a brownie.  Or WINE!  Yes, Wine...  And here is my disclaimer... I am not bashing anyone who does any of the things I don't.  Good for you!  Just know every family has to make decisions that are best for them.  And we each have the things we are passionate about.  In this season of my family's journey, the only thing I am passionate about besides shining Jesus' light is SURVIVAL.  Maybe next season I will have a second and I can research a Bento box...

Hello Sunshine

Moore Tornadoes.  Moore rain.  More tornadoes. More rain.  This Great State I call home has had it’s share of weather drama over the past few weeks.  But we are #oklahomastrong.  We have finally had a couple of beautiful days with bright, abundant sunshine!  We were DUE!  The Weavers even got in on the bad weather blues  last week – in the middle of dance recital!  Thursday during dress rehearsal, all the moms and dancers took cover for 30 minutes or so before resuming the run through.  The first show was scheduled for Friday night at 7.  It was postponed until 7:30 as everyone that was there – dancers, staff, spectators, and vendors – was once again shuttled to “safe” locations within the building.  Some dancers and families never showed up in the first place since there was a threat of severe weather, and some left when we were sent to take cover.  So, the show was completely cancelled and rescheduled for Saturday.  In the meantime, we had a babysitter at our house with Mr. Finn.  She called while we were sheltered at the high school to tell us the power had gone out in ½ of our house.  Come to find out, we had lost a VERY large limb on a tree in the back yard, and it had taken out the power lines that run to our house as it fell.  The power company had to shut off all our power due to the fire risk, and we ended up in a hotel for the night – checked in at 11:15 pm!  LONG night….  Then, 2 recitals the next day (the second one was missing lots of dancers, and the dancers were tired, but I am glad we got to get both shows in!).  Here are my favorite images from that very crazy, more than enough, 24 hours:

Dress Rehearsal - before taking cover

Dress Rehearsal - after taking cover and back to work

Recital - Night one "taking cover." SO BORED!

Betsey and Britt - waiting out the storm..

4 hours later - Finn in the hotel room... "I may not be able to fix storm damage, but I stayed at the Holiday Inn last night!"

Since then, we have been trying to enjoy our summer.  T-ball games!  Several have been canceled and rescheduled due to rain, but we are just a couple of weeks from the end of the season!  The rain has been a constant companion, but it comes with cooler temperatures and overcast skys, so it is a nice change for an Oklahoma summer!  The kids are adjusting to days with Nana, and I have started my summer schedule of 4 – 10 hour work days with Wednesdays off.  This past Wednesday was my first.  We did chores around the house in the morning, ate lunch, then went bowling.  We ran a couple of errands, then came home to make Jello play doughcookies.  Over all, a pretty fun day.  But, FWIW, 4 kids who are all very high energy and 3 of them are high maintenance with forceful personalities will wear ANYONE out!  KUDOS to Nana the Wonder Sitter – I don’t know how she does it!

And in Finn news…  We were trying to sleep train him, but then we had to spend a night in a hotel, and he got this silly summer cold - which put us at his specialist on Monday.  (21 pounds!  YAY!) We’ve been derailed a bit on the sleep thing…  But as soon as he is feeling better we are back at it!  he is on breathing treatments and Dimetapp 3x a day right now.  Poor Peanut! Here is a slide show chronicling the first few nights and how it all went:

By Slide.ly - SlideShow Maker

Finn’s Child Development specialist came to the house for an evaluation yesterday.  She was SO HAPPY with his progress.  He has come a long way in a few short weeks, and he warmed up to her very quickly (which is rare).  He even shared toys, pillows, and used tissues with her! LOL!  At the beginning of the appointment, I told her Finn had 5 words: No, Yes, up, down & uh-oh - in that order, all in the last 7-10 days. These 5 words he uses often and appropriately. While she was there, Finn added cup and ball. Can you say, language explosion?!? She said he is now caught up to his actual age as far as language goes! Just a few short months ago he was MONTHS behind!  And of course, since he is running and climbing like crazy, he has caught up physically, too!  Nana the wonder sitter said he used hello and bye-bye, too!  YAY for talking Finn!

Here's hoping the good news and good weather continue!  We want to go SWIMMING, but it's been too cool!  June doesn't quite feel like June... YET!  Stay tuned!

Survival.

DreamWeaverPrints

I have been writing this post for 2 days.  I can’t seem to find the right words.  We have been in “survival mode” around here for a couple of weeks.  Mainly due to birthday/end of school/church/dance/t-ball/other activities, compounded by the fact that we are still not 100% settled in to the new digs, and just the day to day life of being a large family.  I really want to come out of survival mode.  I want the last few boxes unpacked (we're at the point where daily we don't miss the stuff that's not unpacked, but when you go to look for something specific - like envelopes - they're still packed).  I want the kids immersed in their summer.  I want Finn to go to bed on his own and sleep all night (another post all in itself), and I want the DVR at less than 60%.  But after this horrific week in Oklahoma, none of that matters.  At all.  We are so blessed – BEYOND MEASURE – by the fact that we have a home, warm beds, and all our comforts around us.  So many don’t.

The loss is unimaginable.  Not only of homes, businesses, cars, and physical “stuff,” but of lives, memories, dreams and plans.  Their entire lives turned upside down in a matter of moments.  Torn, literally, to shreds.  As I watched the news and weather coverage on Monday afternoon via the internet from my office 70 miles to the north, I knew this was a bad one.  One like we hadn’t seen in a long time.  We were pretty sure it wouldn’t come this far north, but soon after The Big One “roped out” after destroying Moore, I had Nana the Wonder Sitter go check the Big Dream Weaver kids out of school.  To get them home to our house where we have a basement.  Since apparently, underground was the one way to survive this atrocity.  Luckily, it never got much beyond rain here where we are.  

I was glued to the TV/internet for the next 24 hours.  I literally woke up the next morning in my bed with tears in my eyes.  Those poor families.  Entire neighborhoods.  Communities.  SCHOOLS! Wiped away as if they were tinker toys in a child’s playroom.  And it’s not just Moore on Monday.  But Carney, Shawnee and others on Sunday.  There are smaller communities on the front end of this monster from Monday like Newcastle.  SO MUCH DESTRUCTION for this crazy spring weather.  I know we are PROUD to be Oklahomans and we are STRONG and we rise together when times are tough.  We will pull up by our boot straps and REBUILD.  And I know, “This ain’t our first rodeo.”  But it still hurts.  Shakes us to the core.  Overwhelms the senses.

The out pouring of love and support on EVERY level has been outstanding.  There are so many relief items being donated that they are trying to find places to house it all.  They ask for 1,000 volunteers in a particular location to make something happen, and 2,000 show up.  The list of celebrity and large corporation donations grows hourly.  Local businesses are providing services such as funerals, food, reduced price or free rentals for housing.  EVERYONE is offering money, food, water, Gatorade, plastic bins, gloves, shovels, man power to get to the victims who need it most.  THIS is what it is to be Oklahoman.  This huge outpouring of love and comfort is why I am proud to be born and raised here.  In the homeland.  Where, even if your home is blown away by an EF5 tornado, you still call the land we belong to GRAND!

Here are a couple of things that have really touched me over the last few days that I wanted to share.  A video or two, a photo comparison, and some essays.  And a link to some free images you can use for your facebook/twitter/instagram/whatever to show your support and love for our great state.

Rally Moore Oklahoma- answers WHY we live here

(even if it is “Tornado Alley”)

  Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert "Over You" - The Voice



Moore tornado: A personal note from Damon Lane
What was I thinking?

'This Will Probably Come to Define Us'

Interactive: Moore tornado before and after images

Dream Weaver Prints FREEBIES – images you can use and share.

WE ARE OKLAHOMA!
It takes more than wind to break our stride…

Found on Facebook

Mother's Day 2013

This is a day to honor mothers.  ALL mothers!  We come in so many shapes and sizes. Mother's of babies, toddlers, tweens, teens and adults.  Mothers of fur babies.  Mothers who are moms in their hearts but have empty arms - due to infertility, loss (at any age or stage), or a family situation beyond their control.  There was a time in my life where I never wanted kids.  A dark time where I couldn't have kids.  A time when the 2 I was blessed with at once would be the only ones I ever held.  And now, a time when I know babies will no longer be a part of my future - until I get to be a Nana in a long, LONG time from now.  This is the hardest job I have ever loved.  Happy Mother's day to ALL the moms out there.  The world turns because of YOU!



This video is so powerful.  I am so grateful for all the mothers and motherly infliuences in my life, and in my families' lives.  Blessed beyond measure.  And thankful that these crazy munchkins call me Mom and bring me breakfast in bed once a year!

One Way (Finn's Way)

Hard to believe it is March 5 – ALREADY!  And Finn is 17 months old.  WHAT?!?  But, February was a blur.  With him being sick, in the hospital, and a short month, it FLEW by.  So, yes, Finn is 17 months old.  He is standing on his own for 20-30 seconds, babbling up a storm, has 10 teeth (2 molars on the bottom!), eats everything he can (but yet we still have to supplement with PediaSure – he just doesn’t GAIN), and weighed in at 19 pounds 7 ounces – fully clothed with shoes (Tiny Toms! So cute!) – at the doctor yesterday.  He is a SUPER FAST crawler, and is in to EVERYTHING!  If you can’t find it, check the drawers and cabinets he has been opening – Nana found a missing toy that way, and I found a missing remote control!  (These items had been missing several WEEKS when they were finally found.)  He is still a complete joy and such a happy baby!  His shirt today says it ALL!    Even if the sheer number of doctor appointments has been a bit overwhelming these past few weeks! 

Finn - 17 months - MY WAY!

Britt and I were going through old pictures and videos on our phones over the weekend, and we watched a few videos from our time in the NICU at Mercy.  It still seems surreal – to both of us – that THAT was our lives for over 3 months, and that the tiny struggling baby in those films is OUR son.  It doesn’t seem real.  Or that it happened to us.  But, it was our Finn!  As strong and crazy as he is now, he started out so tiny and frail.  God’s work blows us away.  To HIM be the Glory!

In the meantime, Finn had his first evaluation with the pediatric pulmonologist (physician who specializes in treating diseases of the lungs) yesterday.  We were recommended to see one after our stay in the hospital, and this Doctor came HIGHLY recommended.  While we didn’t really learn much from the visit yesterday, we are glad we went.  They did a chest X-ray (I think this was probably the 20^th one he has had in 17 months), a full exam, and tried to do a sweat test.  This is a test where they stimulate muscles, then collect sweat to evaluate the chemical content in it.  Unfortunately after the (long) procedure, Finn didn’t sweat enough to test anything.  Traditionally, this test is used to check for Cystic Fibrosis, but we know Finn doesn’t have this disease.  So, we assume (no one told us) they do this test routinely just to see what the chemical make-up of the child’s sweat is.  I have another preemie mom friend whose son sees this same physician, and she said they did it with her son as well, and he does not have CF.  So, we were told there is residual evidence of the RSV in his lungs, and to come back in 6 weeks for a follow up and to attempt the sweat test again.  And for Finn to drink LOTS of water before he comes!

(CF sidebar: The girls' father does have CF.  He has a rarer mutation that only slightly effected his lungs, but the end result is what caused us to have to do IVF/ICSI to conceive Emma and Lara.  Before we went ahead with fertility treatments, I was tested to see if I was a carrier since he had the disease, and I am not.  (Both parents have to be carriers in order for the offspring to inherit the disease.)  Each girl has a 25% chance of being a carrier.)

TOMORROW, Finn gets his first HAIRCUT!  I’m sure I will cry.  My last baby’s first haircut.  WOW.  (Emma was over 2 before I cut hers (because she was bald before that), Lara was 11 months,  and Jake was 8 MONTHS at his first haircut!  He had SO MUCH hair!)  I can’t wait to share pictures!